When the best optimum performance is not result based

I have been trying to wake up early and leave home for work earlier so I could possibly be early. The key is I was trying to break any habit that may be bad. Not for company but for myself. But today leaving at around the same time I arrived at the usual place I change a bus later than the timing u aimed for to catch a bus so I could be early. I got almost frustrated an disappointed with myself just because I couldn't catch the bus which I intended to. I rushed on without getting breakfast. I knocked onto some people who I still think could practice a little consideration for peak hour rush by keeping to one side of the escalator. And as I reached the bus stop with no bus in sight, I started to hear the voice of resentments for myself on a simple thing "what's difference between today's walking speed and previously. Did I walk slower? I should have be more of my timing when I walk" On and on, I hear theses voices till I suddenly realise jeez why am I beating myself up over not able to catch the bus when I have been late for almost the longest time. So I let myself take a back step an instead of focusing when is the next bus coming, I look at the person inside me and here're some lessons I learnt:

1. Whatever that has been causing me distress comes from within, the standards and rules I set for myself. Because I don't care if I'm late since I stayed later during knock off hours. I don't care about whether my boss is happy about it. So why I care this time round, because perhaps out of some habits, I quickly set standards subconsciously when I made my mind to break the habit of being late. While it is good to be aware of habits and make changes, one even more important thing that I have to know is I need to be kinder to myself even though there is a standard to meet. My belief that standards r here to meet if not it loses its purpose is probably not frame in the best perspective. Standards are here to be met but the purpose is whatever objective, vision that benefits. It's not about meeting that standards. It's not about the numbers, in this case, it's not about catching the 8.25am bus. It's about making changes and breaking habits.

2. Appreciate and congrats ourselves for making any baby steps progress will bring us much closer to the intended objective instead of questioning myself for not having optimum performance.

3. The best performance is not results based but how well we could dance through any situation with agility physically, emotionally, spiritually. The best performance leaves room for audience to not just applaud but also learn something or reflect on their own stories and gain insights through the dance.